You Need To Stop For A Minute, Before You Get To Deep Up In It…

Asalamalekum. With every generation in music, there are always four types of artists: a top white singer, a top white performer, a top black singer, and a top black performer. Growing up, the top white singer and performer were Mariah and Madonna. And the top black singer and performer were Whitney and Janet. Of course Mariah came out in the 90s, but I remember in the 80s these three women ended a lot of artists’ careers. No one was outselling them. No one was having more hits than them. No one was winning more awards than them. They were unstoppable.

So here in 2009, we have a black artist who is collectively the top female singer, and the top performer. She is better than most artists in singing, dancing, performing, acting, investment banking, and water polo. She can swing a lacefront with fury, and eat a 10-piece from Popeye’s in record time, all while being a drill sergeant at the US Naval Academy. Whether if she is the US Ambassador to the UN, or surfing down a flight of steps, she is Beyoncé Giselle Knowles. Shortly after leading Destiny’s Child to being the best-selling girl group of all time, she went solo which was the original plan before Destiny’s Child. After July 2003, many careers ended. And to save face, we will not list the names of those who were effected.

Beyoncé’s multi-platinum albums, Grammy awards, and saving Americans hundreds on their car insurance just aren’t complete without the haters. They will split hairs, pick at the smallest thing, or talk about her breath just to hate. As the top black artist, many of you need to understand people are going to be highly critical of her. The media is going to pick at her every move. Haters are going to criticize everything she does, while secretly doing all the instructional dances listed in the extended re-released chopped and screwed remix of “Get Me Bodied.” Why? Because she’s a successful black woman who is creating and destroying the industry. America can not take a woman in power, much less a black woman in power. Beyoncé falling down the stairs during The Beyoncé Experience making national headlines only furthers my point. But like Beyoncéitis, I digress. It is much easier to throw black celebrities under the bus versus any other race. Janet slipped in cat piss during the Rhythm Nation 1814 Tour. Michael fell during a performance of “Smooth Criminal.” None of those made headlines. Somehow Beyoncé’s did.

Fans of your favorite flops need to understand a few points:

1. Your favorite artist will not outsell Beyoncé.
2. Your favorite artist will not win any award over Beyoncé.
3. Your favorite artist is not going to change the game.
4. Your favorite artist will not going to take her crown as the top artist.
5. Your favorite artist will not top Beyoncé in any shape, form, fashion, or nature.

* However, the aforementioned points do not apply to Alicia Keys as she consistently outsells Beyoncé with each album, wins Grammys over Beyoncé, and tops her as an artist.

I know you may not agree, but that’s the way love goes. I don’t make up the rules, I just enforce them.

Is it Beyoncé’s fault that your favorite artists’ album failed?
Is it Beyoncé’s fault that your favorite artists’ singles failed?
Is it Beyoncé’s fault that her work ethic is raising the stakes and standards for what is musically pop culture?
Is it Beyoncé’s fault that your favorite artist has to settle for the cheap Remy lacefronts? Well maybe.

Maybe if your favorite artist wasn’t trying to top Beyoncé and does something Beyoncé isn’t like be original, then maybe they will have some success. Maybe you shouldn’t be so concerned with your favorite artist trying to top Beyoncé. Maybe you should be a fan of the music, rather than the fan of the sales. In the event your favorite artist does top Beyoncé, you better believe she’s going to comeback even harder. Just like in 2008, when Rihanna was big, and selling. Beyoncé came back and outsold her in the US in roughly three months. If you have to compare your favorite artists’ new releases to Beyoncé, doesn’t that mean Beyoncé is the one to beat? Doesn’t that take away from your favorite artist? Anytime an award show airs that doesn’t have Beyoncé, it’s going to suck. Anytime Beyoncé takes a break, and people are asking “where is Beyoncé?” it shows who is in control. Understand:

1. Beyoncé is the music industry.
2. Beyoncé owns the music industry.
3. Beyoncé will not be topped by any female artist in the music industry.
4. The entertainment industry revolves around Beyoncé.
5. Beyoncé is pop culture.
6. Beyoncé is the Dalai Lama.


With that said, Beyoncé fans, you will not run away from this scotch free. Part of the reason why haters hate is because of you. If I may quote one of Janet’s most powerful lines:

“…check in the mirror my friend / no lies will be told then / pointin’ the finger again / you can’t blame nobody but you.”


You create hate videos against other artists, throw her name in when it’s not necessary, and brag about her like she just signed a peace treaty in the Middle East. Young Beyoncé-ites, it’s time to grow up. Conversations like these have got to end:

Fan: I love “so-and-so.” She’s really an inspiration to me.

Beyoncé fan: What has she inspired you to do? Flop and be irrelevant?

Fan: I don’t agree with Obama’s candidate for Supreme Court Justice. However, I do support his decision.

Beyoncé fan: Please. Who? How many albums has she sold? How many #1s does she have? Did she win the International Excellence Award? She’s irrelevant. He should have picked Beyoncé.

Fan: I really like Beyoncé when she sings her ballads. She has such a beautifulvoice.

Beyoncé fan: What’s a Beyoncé? She could never see Sasha
when it comes to the stage.

Cease and desist. It is okay to wear your love for Beyoncé on your sleeve, but don’t make it into a “Single Ladies” leotard. Granted you may like to defend Beyoncé’s name, there are more intelligent ways to go about it. For example:


Non-fan/hater: I just can’t get in to Beyoncé. She’s so unoriginal. She’s steals from other artists.

Beyoncé-ite: Well no one is truly original. However she does give credit to who inspired her, and she does make it her own.

Non-fan/hater: Beyoncé is a good performer. But she could never go toe-to-toe with Janet.

Beyoncé-ite: Janet is a good performer. But I personally believe Beyoncé is better.


Beyoncé is the top female in the industry, and just as quickly as she got it, it can be taken away. You need not take her success from granted. She is in her prime. And in a few years someone will come in and replace her. But as of right now, it’s not happening.

For my delusional Beyoncé fans, it’s time to step into the light. Beyoncé did not build the pyramids. She was merely the architect. She did not attend the Yalta Conference. She was merely the coordinator. Beyoncé is the not the greatest person to walk the Earth. She’s behind Oprah. Do not let your stanism cloud your perception of reality.

I’m getting tired, and Wife Swap is about to come on so let me wrap this up. In closing, Beyoncé is the top black artist of our time. No one, as of right now, has enough talent to dethrone her wig. In order to top Beyoncé, you need to be able to do the following: sing well, dance, act, perform, appeal to the gays, be attractive, write, produce, have Barbara Streisand’s elegance, Michael’s popularity, Tina Turner’s energy, Janet’s humbleness and fierceness on stage, and give men in the nursing home their first erection since the end of World War II. Until you find someone who has that, no one is coming for Beyoncé. Point. Blank. Period.


Everyone is going to pick at her for everything she does. You have to learn not to take every comment personally. If someone on a blog makes a comment about Beyoncé’s choice of ankle bracelets, it is not necessary to bring it to BW Board and turn it into a 34 page thread about complete and utter bullshit. Some things you need to take as seriously as people take Rihanna’s singing. To the other fans. Enough. If their name isn’t Alicia Keys, they aren’t going to top Beyoncé. Stop hoping they will, because they won’t.